St. Jude Children's Hospital

So I woke up around five-o-clock this morning wedged in between my toddler and a cold wall. I had to go the bathroom, but I did not want to leave the comfort of my warm bed. As I paused for a moment, the raspy sound of an old woman's voice came drifting from the television I had forgot to turn off before I fell into my deep slumber.

Squinting my eyes, I looked on the screen and saw a three year old boy named Reagan. He was diagnosed with childhood leukemia and passed away eleven months after being admitted to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital. I began to feel very sad. I looked over at my little one, sleeping so soundly, with not a care in the world. Then I thought, "That could be my child in that hospital. That could be Ruki."

And the tears came flowing down my tired face.

I imagined myself being some billionaire philanthropist and giving St. Jude's, or any other children's hospital, a million dollars or more. But I am not a philanthropist, I am just a writer. So, today I am writing to urge everyone to donate your dollars and your prayers to sick and needy children wherever they may be. Don't wait for a tragedy to happen to you or someone you love to start caring. Care now. Give now.

I let her cry herself to sleep...

... for the first time! Ruki never slept in her own room or even a crib, and she is breastfed and I'm always home with her... but enough was enough! I finally weaned her about 3 weeks ago. Thank God, she has been doing great! But I feel like it is time I start putting my foot down for her sake and for my sanity.

She has been going to daycare for the past couple weeks to enable me to focus on my schoolwork. She only goes 3 days a week, but I have seen vast improvements in some aspects of her conduct. For instance, the child who could not sleep without her mommy by her side, lays down and sleeps for 2 hours every day she is at the daycare. This made me think, hmmm? What am I doing wrong? Why is it so hard to get her down for a nap at home?

It all started with the mug I had just finished eating my vegetable soup out of: "Ruki, don't touch the mug!" But it was too late, before I knew it my favorite mug was shattered to pieces on the floor. It was 1:30pm, an hour after I tried to get her the lay down and go to sleep. I lost it.

I'm usually very much a push over, and Ruki knows it. I told that child to lay down and I meant it. I was stern and unrelenting. She threw a tantrum, she threw pillows off the couch, she screamed at the top of her lungs, and for a last burst of protest, she took off her diaper and threw it as far as she could.

As hard as it was, I just ignored her. I had never done that before. In her 22 months of life, I was always at her beckoning call. While I don't regret my "attachment" form of parenting, I realize that was it time for me to "man-up".

Update! Update!

Hey! Hey! Change the baby- I mean toddler, marinate the salmon, check email, check classes, feed Ruki, clean food off Ruki, attempt to do assignments for school, take shower?, brush teeth, try to teach Ruki to brush her teeth correctly, tell Ruki to sit on potty, look for weekend children activities, call exterminator, call cable guy, hmmm what else? And that's just the list for this morning!

So yes I have been busy! Unfortunately some of my friends and family have been moved to the back burner- I don't return many calls these days. But I must say its cool to know I have the kind of friends who are very loving and understanding- Thank God!

Between school, Ruki, and traveling to Philly things have been quite hectic. I'm enjoying being close to my family. Yesterday we went on a fun hayride and pumpkin patch! Ruqayyah was throwing hay on "Pop-Pop". This morning Ruki preferred the yogurt to the oatmeal, so the oatmeal became more of an art project, Smooches!

Bouncing Baby to Healthy Toddler

The past 6 months have ben a cpmplete whirlwind! Here's the update- I'm still breastfeeding. Ruki has 13 teeth (OUCH! just kidding). She is the size of a 2 year old and has the shoe size of a 3 year old! And I couldn't feel more blessed! My baby says lots of words (NO!, baby, eww dirty!, Mommy, DaDa, NaNa, Pop-Pop, HOT, ect...)and is healthy: THIS IS WHAT I PRAYED FOR: a healthy child. I never cared about my baby's gender, skin color, hair texture, or stature. While I was pregnant I just prayed for God to have mercy on me and give me a healthy baby. Thank YOU Allah!

Giving my Breastfed Baby Formula...

I should have just named this blog entry- LOL! I really thought I was going to give my 13 month old formula after being strictly breastfed since birth! HA! This experiment went totally wrong. You might be asking Why? Why now? The move actually came from the desperation to get caught up on my schoolwork.

I always hear about how formula fed babies sleep soundly through the night from an early age. I read on askdrsears.com that phenomena is due to the hard to digest milk curdles that form in the babies stomach. I am a stay-at-home mom, who co-sleeps with her baby, so I was never pressed to have bay Ruki sleep all the way through the night... until now.

Ruki is at a stage in her life were she is chronically teething and suffers from extreme nighttime hunger and separation anxiety! She nurses off and on the entire night, usually without fully awaking. However, if I try to sneak downstairs to get some housework or schoolwork done, and she rolls over to nurse, she awakens and wails until I return.

So basically, tonight I was at wits end and opened a free sample Enfamil sent me in the mail. First I put the strange white mixture in a bottle. The bottle entertained her for about 20 minutes- she chewed on the nipple, then she found out that if she jerked the bottle violently, the white liquid would shoot out in spurts. Then it just made her angry, so she hurled the undrinken bottle through the baby gate into the kitchen and started to cry.

Relentless in my efforts, I transferred the formula into her sippy cup. Well, this just made her plain MAD! She threw the cup down after one sip with disgust and anguish written all over her face. I insulted her intelligence. I insulted her gourmet taste. She will not be fooled!

So I sat on the couch and breastfed my little angel to sleep and instead of getting right to my schoolwork, I am blogging about my little princess.

So I'm Starting School...

So I'm starting school tomorrow, and I feel... anxious. I'm really excited, but at the same time, I am unsure that I have the capacity to do well in two Internet classes, because I was always the type that benefited from hands-on education. Taking on Internet classes, along with my other full time job (you know, the Mommy stuff) is just slightly daunting.

God has been really great to me, because he has shown me many great examples of stay-at-home mothers who also go to school. Some of them have outside help, like in-laws or parents or other relatives that help them with the children. I do not have these wonderful people in my locale as of right now.

However, I told myself I would stop finding excuses not to go, and just take the semester on like a charging bull. I recognise that it is a major blessing from Allah to be in a position where I can attend school in the first place.

I took two classes while I was pregnant, and had been looking forward to going back ever since. I declared my major: Journalism. I thought about World Affairs and Creative Writing majors also, but I think I need to just have faith in my abilities as a journalist since that is what lites my flame.

Pray for Me!!

Phenomenal Woman

This poem written and narrated by none other than famed poet Maya Angelou is dedicated to all the beautiful sisters holding down families, households, careers, or maybe just themselves. I just wanted to let you all know that you ARE intelligent and beautiful and worthy of being loved and appreciated. YOU ARE PHENOMENAL!

Phenomenal Womanby Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.


I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.


Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.


Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.


Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need for my care.
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Maya Angelou, “Phenomenal Woman” from And Still I Rise. Copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou.

Source: The Complete Collected Poems of Maya Angelou (Random House, Inc., 1994)